The haughtiness of women who have won the battle of the sexes is offensive to God. Just as the man who is domineering to his wife is offensive to God. Sadly, we live in a day and age which is very much akin to the one in which we see in Isaiah 1-3 and Amos 4. These passages are describing, respectively, the kingdom of Judah and the Kingdom of Israel. They are describing societies captured by pusillanimous men and domineering wives, women who mince about, boss their husbands around, and believe they are secure in their prosperity.
Meanwhile, the hoards of men from cultures that don’t tolerate such behaviour are increasing and banging down the doors of our nation…I mean their nation…well, both really. In fact, do you think it is an accident that the vast majority of our immigrants come from patriarchal societies? It is a historical trend that such societies overtake those where gender roles are confused.
So, what do women desire most of all? This: “Then have I got of you the mastery, Since I may choose and govern, in earnest?” I think many men give into their wife’s desire to rule in the home for a simple reason: it is easier. It is easier to just defer to that than deal with the stress that can come from seeking to resist giving into this. But this is the man’s challenge, to lead well, without becoming a tyrant himself. This is what men are called to. This is the challenge, if you are willing to accept it.
More men should be taught this before they pursue marriage, too many are fooled by our modern society’s lies about egalitarianism and go charging into marriage thinking it will be an equal partnership, only to find out that what their wife means by equal is that you defer to her whenever she requires. Many Aussie men acquiesce to that desire of their wives. After working all day, dealing with things going wrong at work, dealing with modern traffic, dealing with whatever else is going on, who has the emotional energy to care enough to seek to wrestle over such things?
The diligent man, that is who.
But beware ye men who shun that diligence, because many women come to despise the men who give in and are ruled by them. Women want a man they can respect. They want this as much, or even more, than a man to rule. When they work hard to rule, it is so that they can feel safe. A man who is too easily ruled is not dangerous, but he is also not safe, because his soft belly has been exposed. This is why so many women become very masculine in their outlook as they age, they have had to harden to keep themselves safe. This is also why so many of these men find their wives falling for other men, they are drawn to a man they can respect.
This area is more of an art than a science. Every couple is going to work this out in different ways, or not at all, but all will face this struggle. I am simply noting that you should not go into marriage unaware of this tendency in women, and of the effects this will have on you, your marriage, your children, your church, and every part of society your family touches.
And society, in general, is barracking for your wife to win the struggle for leadership. Come to think about it, is that not what the movie What Women Want is about? Did not Helen Hunt gain the upper hand over Gibson’s character? Interesting how the newer tales are just versions of the ancient tales, indicating that this is a perennial truth.