Friday, July 31, 2020

Vox Popoli: Mailvox: the importance of family privacy - (Mandatory reading for families!)

A reader belatedly decides that I was right to keep my family out of the public eye:

Just wanted to share with you what I've learned about keeping things private and especially keeping your children out of the social media world and all of that. One of the first times I saw you was on Jesse Lee Peterson, and when Jesse asked you about your kids I soured on you. He merely asked how many you had or how old they were, absolutely casual and normal questioning, but you went a bit quiet and hesitant and replied that you didn't like to talk about your kids. I thought it was a bit rude and it sliced through the fun and camaraderie you two (and us in the audience) were enjoying.

I didn't think anything ill of you for something that simple, but it seemed a strange quirk or issue, I wasn't sure. But I read more of your blog, and have watched nearly every Darkstream since, and thought your rule about banning or ignoring the questions about yourself or your family were a bit overboard. Not because I didn't know how much you're hated by the SJW demons and how badly they would love to get any info on you they could to hurt you, that is obvious and I respect that justification for privacy. But the cloak around your family was extreme, again just insofar as even relaying an anecdote or being able to share memories about them as part of the dialogue, since a decent chunk of the community talks about the family and marriage cornerstones.

Well, here I am realizing how right you were, because my brother posted a picture on his FB of him holding a can of Goya from his truck's cargo. He was smiling and posted it saying thank you to the President for appreciating the company and about how simple things like what Goya produces are taken for granted. A message of decency and gratitude, and the insanity that follows I still can't believe. This vile woman went trawling through his FB, found pics of his kids with their school either captioned or mentioned, and contacted the fucking school to tell them their dad was dangerous, that he was a racist, blah blah. This nonsense took a few days to sort out as my brother had to return from his job, and he let the school have it for even entertaining this bullshit, and got them to apologize to him. It's not a typical cancel culture ending, thank God, but the fact that he had to go through this shit in the first place!

Now I think about this, about my brother who is barely even political but just said thanks to the President for supporting a large company. That's freaking it, nothing else on his FB, only pics of their family, dogs, etc.! So I thought back to you, about how you had reacted to Jesse, and how I misjudged you and didn't FULLY appreciate what these monsters would like to do to you. I not only respect you shutting all inquiries about your family down, I admire it.


Fair enough. Now, I will readily admit that there is only so much you can do, what with public records and curious fans and naive friends and family members who don't understand how there could possibly be any harm in posting innocent pictures where no one is doing anything even remotely objectionable. And eventually, your children are going to grow up and live their own lives.

But there is no reason to make it easy for the stalkers and trolls and would-be harassers to chronicle your life, and the harder you make it for them, the more likely it is that they will cross a criminal line that will give the police, or at least the social media police, a reason to crack down hard on them. And, more importantly, living a public life online should be the child's choice, not the parent's.

It's too bad, because what parent isn't proud of their children and eager to share their achievements and accomplishments. But the world has changed, we now live in a no-quarter culture that refuses to distinguish between combatants and non-combatants, and it is vital to understand that even as we embrace the conflict.